Words Matter

You all know we're into crazy silly season in the Democratic race for the nomination, and here we go with another major gaffe, this time from HRH (Her Royal Highness) HRC. She had to say the word assassination, referring back to RFK's run for the presidency into June of 1968 as a way of explaining why she wants to stay in the race until the last primary in June 2008.

I will refrain from my views on where this came from in her psyche, but I will say this: words matter. Words are powerful little utterances that have a way of revealing our thoughts, our intentions, and even our subconscious wishes. Given the immediacy of YouTube and the internet, people in public and the words they speak are scrutinized like never before. We have "God damn America"--..."Bitter and cling to their religion"..." hard working Americans, white Americans...". We have the macaca moment that brought down a senate candidacy.

So, how do we sharpen our ability to choose our words well, to say what we mean and speak with fairness, with caring intelligence and in a way that does not for a second diminish another human being? Saying something that reveals our own naivete is something that we can correct by trail and error, but saying things that diminish another can lose us friendships, collegiality, family bonds and business relationships that we may not be able to recover. We don't have the luxury of trial and error when it comes to speaking into relationship.

And that's the heart of it all. Everything we say and write has an original context of relationship. Even when we must be critical, there is a way of saying important words that leave the other person whole and able to hear us. This is where the work is.