Writing About Character

The worst thing in writing about character is that the mirror is turned back around on myself. I have to reflect on my own behavior all the time, every day, and who wants to? I would as soon throw the nit picky stuff under the rug and MOVE ON! Why put the bothersome issues under a microscope?

There's only one answer: put them into the visible realm because they already exist in a repressed area where they will arise over and over until we take a good hard look and engage them face to face. It's now or later, and later may be harder or inconvenient. And of course, later may never come (now that solves the problem).

I dont like to fight with people, especially those I ordinarily trust and love, but walking away and letting a friend get by with murder is a poor second choice. My fear of the confrontation is the fight she'll give back---her need to make me into someone who has aggrieved her (I apparently did). What I can't agree to is being in the wrong for what her complaint is---I did something reasonable and she is hyper sensitive. My grievance is with her accusations and then her hanging up on me (I wasn't arguing).

It comes down to this: I can't walk away, I can't avoid her (a foolish passive aggressive tactic). I have to stand up for myself and risk losing a friendship I feel is getting weaker by the week. And for me it comes down to character. It's lonely to develop a backbone. People leave; they cry; they whine. They even sue you! (Not my fear here). But there it is. It's now or later. And now is all I've got.